Pastor's Blog

March 7, 2021

Proverbs 25:8 “Go not forth hastily to strive, lest thou know not what to do in the end thereof, when thy neighbour hath put thee to shame.”

A preacher visited an old lady from his congregation. As he sat on the sofa he noticed a big bowl of peanuts on the coffee table. “Okay if I have a few?” he asked. “No, not at all,” said the old lady. They chatted for an hour and when the preacher stood to leave he noticed that instead of eating a few peanuts, he’d emptied most of the bowl. “I’m really sorry for eating all your peanuts, I meant to eat just a few.” “Oh, that’s okay,” replied the old lady. “Ever since I lost my teeth, all I can do is suck the chocolate from them anyway.”

March 1, 2021

ATTITUDE

Proverbs 17:22 “A merry heart doeth good like a medicine: but a broken spirit drieth the bones.”

Once upon a time a woman woke up one morning, looked in the mirror, and saw that she had only three hairs on her head. “Well,” she said, “I think that today I might braid my hair.” And she did, and she had a great day. The next morning she woke up, checked herself in the mirror and discovered that she only had two hairs on her head. “Hmm,” she said, “Maybe I’ll part my hair down the middle today.” So she did, and she had a fantastic day. The next morning she woke up, looked in the mirror and found that she had only one hair left on her head. “Well,” she said, “Not to worry. Today I’ll wear my hair in a pony tail.” So she did, and she had the best day. The next day she woke up, looked in the mirror and noticed that there wasn’t one single hair on her head. “Hooray!” she exclaimed. “I don’t have to do my hair today!”

February 26, 2021

Authority….

An old lady returned home from a church service to find an intruder in the process of ransacking her house. “Stop!” she yelled. “Acts 2:38!” (which says, “Repent!”) The burglar stopped dead while the old lady called the police. As he handcuffed the burglar, the officer asked, “How come you just stood there? All the old lady did was quote a Bible verse.” “A Bible verse?” the thief replied. “She said she had an axe and two .38s!”